I'm following Madysyn's saga with great interest. My good angel wants the story to end here, with things going so well for her. My bad angel wants a monster earthquake to rock San Francisco, burying Madysyn, Caeli, Eli and the "engineers" in the rubble.
Big pieces of this remind me strongly of T.S. Eliot which is the highest compliment I can give. The way you take an individual story and yet make it feel universal is very good. And this -
"Ekphrastic, she wanted to name it, but
the sense outran her, always on the horizon—
was like the horizon itself the way it receded.
And out of reach, a brightness, toward which
her mind raced excitedly. How halcyon
her thoughts, dazzling like sparklers in the dark
that hid behind their light she knew not what.
Yet she was alive, and not exhaustion
of the long night could keep her from her task."
______
is brilliant writing.
Also I spotted a Tennyson reference! (there's probably other literary references but that's the one I spotted!)
Thank you Claire. That’s a huge compliment. He’s still the standard, even after a hundred years. And yeah, there’s some Tennyson. I’ve been rereading The Princess, so he’s been on my mind.
Yet she was alive, and not exhaustion => no exhaustion
of the long night could keep her from her task
Also, thanks! I like the (at least temporarily) positive portrayal of work, and of engineers, and for letting the light of American Romanticism shine not only the moods of this young women, but on American business and Silicon Valley. Why not? We have moments when work is awesome, and life is awesome, and poetry should be capacious enough handle that.
Thank you Matt. The 'not' is technically modifying 'could.' "exhaustion of the long night could not keep her from her task." I moved it forward cause I liked how it sounded.
I love the language of the tech world you guys use. Scrum and Agile and debugging and all that. It deserves to be in a poem. Poetry should be capacious enough to use it, like you say.
I'm following Madysyn's saga with great interest. My good angel wants the story to end here, with things going so well for her. My bad angel wants a monster earthquake to rock San Francisco, burying Madysyn, Caeli, Eli and the "engineers" in the rubble.
Thanks Peter. I have those same angels. But I do know how the story ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.
This is inspiring me!
Thank you Zane. Your inspiration is my encouragement!
Big pieces of this remind me strongly of T.S. Eliot which is the highest compliment I can give. The way you take an individual story and yet make it feel universal is very good. And this -
"Ekphrastic, she wanted to name it, but
the sense outran her, always on the horizon—
was like the horizon itself the way it receded.
And out of reach, a brightness, toward which
her mind raced excitedly. How halcyon
her thoughts, dazzling like sparklers in the dark
that hid behind their light she knew not what.
Yet she was alive, and not exhaustion
of the long night could keep her from her task."
______
is brilliant writing.
Also I spotted a Tennyson reference! (there's probably other literary references but that's the one I spotted!)
Thank you Claire. That’s a huge compliment. He’s still the standard, even after a hundred years. And yeah, there’s some Tennyson. I’ve been rereading The Princess, so he’s been on my mind.
I think you have an extra t (no => not) here:
Yet she was alive, and not exhaustion => no exhaustion
of the long night could keep her from her task
Also, thanks! I like the (at least temporarily) positive portrayal of work, and of engineers, and for letting the light of American Romanticism shine not only the moods of this young women, but on American business and Silicon Valley. Why not? We have moments when work is awesome, and life is awesome, and poetry should be capacious enough handle that.
Thank you Matt. The 'not' is technically modifying 'could.' "exhaustion of the long night could not keep her from her task." I moved it forward cause I liked how it sounded.
I love the language of the tech world you guys use. Scrum and Agile and debugging and all that. It deserves to be in a poem. Poetry should be capacious enough to use it, like you say.